I am so tired....

Can I be tired today? I need to be tired. I so much try to be upbeat and strong and just keep going and not complain. But today...I am tired. I am tired of not getting enough sleep. I am tired of not having time alone. I am tired of giving people medicine (including myself), I am tired of Korie getting UTIs and taking her to the doctor all the time, I am tired of worrying about Kristin and about if she is safe, if her grades are good, if she will find the right person and will God work in her life.

I am tired of missing my parents and of thinking about someone else living in my childhood home. I am tired of cleaning the same things and the same clothes over and over. I am sooo tired.

I am tired of making sure Korie is cathed every 4 hours. I am tired of my shoulder hurting all the time from helping her move in and out of my chair and I am tired of dealing insurance issues all the time!!!!!! (I am REALLY tired of that one!). I am even tired of people not knowing how tired I am!! :) There are so many other reasons I am tired...the demands of life call to me.

I would never have written all this out if I hadn't seen some of the psalms where David tells exactly how he feels....thing is....David then ends the psalm with the other side of the coin.....

So.....I am thankful for life...for the ability to get up in the morning. I am grateful for my daughters and for all that comes with them for it makes them part of who they are. I can trust them to the Lord. I appreciate that there are doctors and procedures to make Korie's life a good one. I am grateful for her love and her smile and for a husband who loves and cares for his family. I am in gratitude that my parents are in heaven waiting for me and that God made it possible for my sins to be forgiven and has given me a home. Someday, I will live there and I won't be tired anymore. I will be rested, calm and in the place where I was meant to be and the type of person I was meant to be. I will be surrounded by the family of God. Praise Him for all His has done, all He is doing and all He will do. I am most blessed.

On days like today, I look forward....and that helps me to go another day.